Subject: FW: How to cook a raccoon (vent studios part II)


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From: Tony Smith <tsmith@usaopoly.com>
Date: Mon, 7 Oct 2002 09:08:11 -0700 
To: "'gouldeffect@attbi.com'" <gouldeffect@attbi.com>
Subject: How to cook a raccoon (vent studios part II)

Okay, last night I had a dream that was so fucked up I have to recount it
here.  I was in Army Basic Training, and everybody but me was black.  They
all hated me.  They said, "I am suspicious of you."  The only person I was
able to befriend was the cook, a fiftyish woman who talked incessantly about
numerology.  She was standing at a grill with her assistant and barbecueing
giant frozen raccoon steaks, which she would slice off the whole, frozen
raccoons with a big, noisy device.  There was a light-fixture-like device in
the ceiling that poured blood all over everything.

There was a 'battle drill' during which the attack on the enemy consisted of
unspooling miles of kite string on them, which then exploded.  It was just
about then that I realized I had made a big mistake in joining the army.